Once upon a time, I asked my dear friend and roommate Taylor Mobley a profound question…”So, how do you know if you’re bipolar?” She proceeded to tweet about it and laugh hysterically until she realized I was serious…then she just laughed some more. But really, people. I feel like I’m so up and down it’s insane. You know the phrase, “Life is like a rollercoaster,” right? Well…I bring new meaning to that one. It’s like I play emotional roulette every morning…like mama always said, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what mood Cwalk’s gonna be in today.” Wait…that’s wasn’t it was it? Ok I digress…All that to say that I feel like I’m up and down these days. I’m happy one day, depressed the next. Here’s some happy thoughts…

So, since I haven’t blogged in a few days, I’m just going to bullet point some pretty unreal things about Thailand and my life I’m starting here. Hopefully you’ll enjoy reading about them as much as I enjoy writing about them…because believe me, I’m probably smiling as I blog.

1.  My mornings. — So, in the mornings I do the typical “hit the snooze alarm button for an hour and finally roll out of bed just in time to leave for work” thing. Thank God my hair is still permanently straight from last time I was here. I don’t even own a hair drier or a straightener. I can get ready in 10 minutes flat and look half-way decent. I mean, who am I trying to impress at BCC? Right. Nobody. (Good thing because I for sure forgot to put on make-up the other day…oh yes, on the day where we all wear gym clothes. Guess who looked like a gym coach lezzie? Me. Haha.) Ok anyway. After I leave my apartment, I get a song-tow…it’s a little red pickup truck with a cover over the bed and 2 benches to sit on. I ride that bad boy to work, and it only takes about 5 minutes. Then the hard part comes. I have to wind my way in and out of thousands of BCC boys who are tugging along rolly backpacks that are twice their size, attempting to pull them up stairs or successfully running over my tattooed feet (well, foot.)…which I’ve officially given up on hiding because it’s just not worth it. No one really cares anyway. (P.S. Speaking of tattoos, my dearest mother informed me that my daddy knows about all of mine now…awesome. Guess I miss that memo where mamas don’t obey the hoes-over-bros code. Thanks mom. Haha.) So I get to school and navigate my way through the student obstical course to the fruit bar area and get some fruit for the day (healthy living points right there thanks). Then I make my way up to the office…which is more like The Office than I can even explain to you. If only I could just record a day in that place to make you understand how incredibly ridiculous things get. I can honestly say that I expect a full-out brawl to take place at any moment. Ok…screeching halt. I’m done talking about my mornings. On to the next thing…

2. Thailand Transportation — Motorbike taxis are by far the rawest thing about this country. I would take one of those everywhere I went if I could. They’re super fun. So, since I’m a classy lady who wears dresses/skirts, I get the privilege of riding side-saddle on the motorbike…and it’s actually not as difficult as you might think. However, factor in a 15 lb. backpack and at times an awkward yoga mat and it takes some serious talent to rock that balancing act. I’ll admit…I try to act all hard and experienced since I’m no longer a tourist and all (no big deal. lol)…but it still blows my freaking mind how those bike drivers can weave their way in and out of traffic, cutting off cars and flying by huge buses by only a matter of a few inches, barely managing to not knock off every side mirror they pass. (Sorry parents, that might sound dangerous…no worries! Haha.) But yeah, it’s unbelievable. And I love it.  So, next I’ll take a moment to complain about song-tows (red truck things). Normally, they’re cool. But sometimes you get an old morning glory who will pass you up and only pick up Thai people. I mean, sorry I’m white and sexy. (Ha.) But for real…I’m not even going to lie and say that some people aren’t racist here. A lot of the times, foreigners are treated like dirt and it’s straight up bullcrap. One song-tow actually did that to me tonight, so I ended up having to hail a tuk-tuk for 50 BHT (as opposed to the normal 5 BHT for a song-tow) and we rode right behind the dang song-tow the whole way home. Ugh…bullcrap. But such is life. I mean really, it’s like $1.50. Whatever. P.S. I don’t like tuk-tuks…the tourists can have those ripoffs.

3. Rainy Season – Well, it monsoons here about once a day, and it’s always at the most inconvenient of times. I normally get caught in the rain and end up walking home drenched and looking like a wet rat (Hmm…maybe I should write a song about that…haha 2159). But it’s always so fun, and you really just gotta laugh about it because there’s not a dang thing to avoid it. Well, except carrying an umbrella I guess, but I always forget mine at home so it really never helps me out much. I just hope I can keep my feet clean in all the nasty standing water everywhere…hello parasites. Ugh. Gross.

4. Food - I would like to say that I’ve never been so gung-ho about trying random (disgusting) foods. But something has gotten into me as of late…some kinda seize the day kinda crap…and I’m all about trying every kind of food on the Thai menu. (I know, I watched Dead Poet’s Society the other night…that’s where the seize the day thing came from.) Ok…here’s what all I have tried in the last 3 days. I ATE A WHOLE SQUID (check out the picture!)….like, we’re talkin’ tentacles and all. Yep. I did it. Get on my level. It was gross of course, but I was proud of myself. I also ate some kind of random fish ball things (vomit)…fried squid (good)…lamb ball things (surprisingly good)…minced, deep fried catfish (so good!)…green curry with shrimp (good)…some kinda coconut milk soup (too sweet..but alright)…crab salad with something that I can’t remember (amazing)…and then remember I ate raw tuna and salmon teriaki last week. So…that’s all exciting. Bring it on…put me on Fear Factor…there’s nothing this girl won’t try (within reason…haha).

5. Random, stream-of-consciousness kinda things…

• My passive-aggressiveness might just be my downfall in the BCC version of The Office.
• 5th graders are angels; 6th graders are demons.
• Noodle soup doesn’t fill you up. You’ll be hungry 30 minutes later and pig out on something else, so it’s really pointless to eat.
• Designer stuff is still super expensive here…even if it is Thailand.
• My grocery list consists of Oreos and Ritz crackers. I miss my Cheez-its.
• Wearing headphones means “don’t talk to me” but some people just don’t understand that.
• I don’t have to really worry about getting hit on by farang men (white guys) because they tend to only want to speak to super skinny Thai prostitutes. Ok…maybe I’m exaggerating a bit. But that’s a soapbox I’ll save for another post. Don’t get me started…
• I bought Galileo’s Biography…and I’m stoked about it. Yes, I’m a science nerd. Don’t care. Judge me.
• Smog and contacts don’t mix. I’ve worn my glasses like everyday. Bonk.
• Thai personal trainers are untactful morning glories. One told me that I was fat to my face and said I had “beer” in my stomach…in my arms…in my legs…etc. I wanted to be like, “Yeah b****…these legs could crush you. Say something else and find out…” UGH. Whatever…motivation to work out I guess. Hello inner-thigh machine, here I come.
• My July holiday is going to be UNREAL. My friend Matt Redfern is teaching in Korea right now…and he’s gonna fly down to Bangkok, and we’re going to Cambodia to see Angkor Wat. We’re gonna pay $1 and sleep in hammocks on the river and backpack around for a few days. I can’t freaking wait!!!! Angkor Wat is one of the 7 Wonders and it’s at the top of my To-Do list while I’m over here. I’m excited to check that one off the list first thing!
• A lot of people don’t understand the term “backpacking” in America. Google it guys…
• Working out makes me feel good and bad. I feel good in that I can conquer the world, but I feel bad in that my body is crumbling. I kinda like it…
• It is possible to get closer to people when you’re literally a world apart. At least over this first month I believe so. I hope and pray that continues. I’m rather enjoying knowing who is thinking about me and cares enough to take time out of their day to continue our friendship(s). Thanks guys…I really appreciate it. You’ll never know how much you mean to me.
• God is constantly opening up doors…it’s my job to take the opportunities given to me. I’ll write about that later…that’s an entire post in itself.

OK OK OK…I’m going to shut up now. I just wrote a book. Guess that makes up for not blogging all week. Haha. Love you guys. Hope you can tell that I’m actually enjoying my time here more than I originally was. Though I have my bad days, the good days are starting to make a comeback. There goes that whole bipolar thing…haha. But it’s all good…

I’m out. //Cwalk.

^ squid. eww. ^